Imagine this: You’re leading an entire nation through the wilderness. You’ve just been instructed directly by HaShem to speak to a rock so it will bring forth water for the people. Yet, in a moment of frustration, you strike the rock instead. That’s what happened to Moses, one of the greatest leaders of all time, and it altered the course of his leadership journey.
So what went wrong? What was the deeper significance of Moses striking the rock, and how does it relate to our own moments of frustration? Let’s dive into the Zohar’s explanation and some modern psychological insights to understand Moses’ actions, and more importantly, how we can learn from them.
What Really Happened at the Rock? The Zohar’s Spiritual Insight
The Zohar, a central Kabbalistic text, gives us a profound explanation of this moment. It tells us that Moses, in striking the rock instead of speaking to it, allowed his human emotion—his frustration—to override his trust in the divine word. The rock, the Zohar says, represents the heart of the people, and by striking it, Moses missed an opportunity to elevate the people through words of holiness.
Words have power, especially when used in service of the divine. Had Moses spoken to the rock as commanded, he would have uplifted not only himself but also the people around him. But by striking it, he missed the chance to sanctify HaShem’s name in a way that could have deeply impacted the Israelites. This act of frustration ultimately prevented Moses from leading the people into the Promised Land, symbolizing a failure to fully trust and glorify HaShem in that crucial moment.
For us Emuna Builders, this story carries an essential lesson: words, when infused with kavana (intention), can elevate those around us. But when we act out of frustration, we lose the chance to bring holiness into our interactions.
Why We Act in Frustration: Modern Psychological Insights
It’s easy to look at Moses and think, “How could he make that mistake?” But in reality, we all have moments where frustration takes over, clouding our judgment. Understanding why we act in frustration can help us learn from Moses’ experience. Let’s take a look at some psychological theories that shed light on Moses’ reaction.
Cognitive Dissonance: A Clash of Beliefs and Actions
Cognitive dissonance occurs when our actions don’t align with our beliefs, creating internal conflict. Moses believed in the power of HaShem’s word, yet his actions—striking the rock instead of speaking to it—were in direct contradiction to that belief. His frustration may have created a momentary lapse, where the dissonance between his trust in HaShem and his emotional state led to an impulsive act.
We experience this same inner conflict in everyday life. How often do we know what the right thing to do is, yet, when emotions are running high, we act out of frustration instead? Just like Moses, our frustration can cloud our ability to make decisions that reflect our highest values.
Emotional Regulation: The Struggle to Control Frustration
Emotional regulation is the ability to manage our emotions in a way that aligns with our goals. In Moses’ case, his goal was to lead the people faithfully according to HaShem’s commands. But his frustration got the better of him, leading him to act impulsively rather than with careful thought. This moment of lost self-regulation caused him to strike the rock, a decision that had lasting consequences.
For us, emotional regulation is key in our daily lives—especially in moments of stress or frustration. When we learn to pause and control our reactions, we can choose words and actions that align with our emuna and our trust in HaShem.
Behavioral Conditioning: The Pull of Old Habits
From a behavioral perspective, Moses may have been conditioned to act in a certain way. He had struck the rock once before (Exodus 17:6), and perhaps that past experience conditioned him to respond physically rather than verbally. In moments of stress, we often revert to familiar habits, even if they don’t align with what we know to be right.
How many times do we act out of habit, rather than pausing to think about what we’re truly being called to do? Moses’ moment reminds us that past behaviors can be hard to break, but with mindfulness, we can choose a different path.
Turning Frustration Into Growth: Lessons for Emuna Builders
Moses’ experience at the rock offers us valuable lessons in how to transform frustration into spiritual growth. The Zohar’s message, combined with psychological insights, shows us that frustration is a natural human experience, but it doesn’t have to define us.
Self-Determination: Finding Autonomy in Challenging Times
One theory that helps explain Moses’ frustration is Self-Determination Theory, which suggests that when we feel a lack of autonomy or control, we’re more likely to react negatively. Moses was leading a people who constantly complained, doubted, and rebelled. It’s understandable that he might have felt his leadership was being undermined, leading to frustration.
For us, the feeling of being out of control can often lead to frustration, especially in challenging situations. But we can find autonomy by choosing how we respond—by speaking words of holiness instead of acting out of impulse.
Building Emuna Through Mindful Responses
At its core, this story is about emuna—faith and trust in HaShem’s plan, even when things are difficult. Moses’ frustration clouded his trust in HaShem in that moment, leading him to act out. But for us, this is a reminder that we can strengthen our emuna by practicing mindfulness and intentionality in our words and actions.
One practical way to do this is to take a moment to breathe and reflect before responding to a situation that triggers frustration. By creating space between our emotions and our actions, we allow our trust in HaShem to guide our responses, rather than our frustration.
Real-Life Applications: Speak, Don’t Strike
So how can we apply the lessons of Moses’ story to our own lives? Here are some practical tips for turning frustration into an opportunity for growth:
1. Pause Before Reacting: When you feel frustration rising, take a moment to breathe. This simple act can help you regulate your emotions and choose your words carefully.
2. Speak Words of Kindness: Remember the power of words to elevate and sanctify. When you feel the urge to “strike” with harsh words or actions, try speaking gently instead.
3. Reflect on Past Habits: Are there moments when you’ve acted out of frustration because of past habits? Take note of these patterns, and consciously choose a different response.
4. Strengthen Your Emuna: When frustration strikes, remind yourself of HaShem’s plan. Trust that even in challenging moments, you are being guided.
What We Learn From Moses and Ourselves
Moses’ experience at the rock is more than just a story of frustration—it’s a profound lesson in emuna, emotional regulation, and the power of words. As women of the Emuna Builders community, we have the opportunity to learn from Moses’ moment and apply these lessons to our own lives.
By choosing to speak instead of strike, to regulate our emotions, and to trust in HaShem’s plan, we can transform moments of frustration into opportunities for holiness.
So, the next time frustration rises, remember Moses and the rock—and choose to elevate your words, sanctifying HaShem in all that you do.
What do you think? How have you overcome moments of frustration through emuna? Share your thoughts in the comments below, and let’s continue to grow together as Emuna Builders.
This blog is in the zechut of Eden Yerushalmi, 24, of Tel Aviv, a Pilates instructor, was working as a bartender at the Nova Music Festival on October 7 when the attack began. She was held captive for over 300 days before being brutally murdered just a few days ago. On Saturday, August 31, 2024, a combined IDF-ISA force located her body and returned it to Israel. May her neshema make the highest aliyah.
In my book Pick Me Up HaShem, you’ll find many prayers that explore how HaShem is constantly drawing us closer to Him, inviting us into a deeper relationship through prayer and reflection. These prayers are designed to help you connect with the divine presence in a way that transcends mere requests and taps into the true purpose of prayer.
If you’re ready to dive deeper into these spiritual truths, consider studying Kabbalah, the mystical tradition that unlocks the profound secrets of our reality and draws us closer to HaShem’s divine wisdom. Delve into teachings that illuminate the “why” behind the Torah, connecting the layers of Creation in a synergized whole and offering a glimpse of HaShem in a way no other study can. From the timeless wisdom of Rabbi Chaim Vital and the Arizal to the unifying insights of Rabbi Sar-Shalom Sharabi (Rashash), Kabbalah not only transforms your spiritual understanding but also brings peace, protection, and redemption closer to our world. Sponsor my study in this sacred tradition and receive its blessings for sustenance, health, and family, ensuring that the powerful light of Kabbalah shines in your merit.
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